Last week, a member of the Happy Godessa Club posed a really interesting conversation. It got me thinking and I decided to share the answer I gave her. She mentioned that “I am really shy and embarrassed to express my feelings and my opinions in a place where I work, especially when we are in a group… I would like to change that because it makes me feel awkward and unheard and makes me unhappy at work when I have so much to offer”
How many of us have even been in a similar situation? How many of us have this feeling at some point in their life?
First, I would like us to look at where is “I am shy and embarrassed to express myself” come from. Let’s analyze that with no judgment whatsoever.
What kind of person are you?
Where is the fear coming from?
Is it not having an “expressive talent” because your power lies somewhere else?
Or is it something that you picked up along the way that made you be afraid to express yourself, or shy or embarrassed?
We want to see if the fear comes from nature or from nurture first.
Some people have a natural talent to be extroverted and expressive and take their space. Some people are not like that. Their talents lie in other places like deep thinking or understanding or creating or conceptualizing.
But expressing all of those things is not their strongest point.
All talents and skills are valuable.
In any case, the first reaction is non-judgmental because you can transform and empower anything and everything just with the power of love – self-love, which means you accept it or yourself or this behavior unconditionally!!!
Accepting unconditionally whatever you are, whatever you cannot do, you accept that a hundred percent. You stand behind yourself like a good strong mother to a child who’s afraid to go to school on the first day.
When do we know if it is from your nature or from your environment?
We already have more tools. Let’s say it is from your nature.
It’s your nature to be an introvert, expressive, which is just a different style and it all comes to your acceptance of your style. Maybe it is different than other people but you supporting yourself and standing behind who you naturally are, will give you more weight and will help you be easy with the way you express yourself. In other words, when your inner judgment is gone you will be more natural and confident.
Your inner dialogue will be more: “I need a little bit more time to reflect. I’m not a jumper into a conversation, but that’s okay because that’s my style”. When you are standing behind yourself, you will have more weight and naturally take more space. People will feel more comfortable and just wait to hear what you have to say because energetically you will communicate from your center.
By honoring your own self and the natural way you will give your colleagues a chance to enjoy a different style of communication, and your strength and uniqueness will give them permission to be themselves. Other members of your circle will enjoy new color into the rainbow. So honor that.
In nurture, the fear to express comes from the environment, meaning that as a child may be your expression was punished or ashamed or insulted in some way. For that, we need a different approach of healing, by acknowledging that there is a wound somewhere on the expression and that we need to bring ourselves to heal that. Here, we first activate the non-judgment observation and total self-love to where you are right now.
Expand your heart and compassion to the part of yourself that is wounded about its expression.
This is probably one of the greatest lessons you can have. You can see woundedness and instead of judging or thinking that you should be something else, you turn into the part of you that is hurt or afraid or has a bad memory about that and give it, marinate with love and self-acceptance and self-reflection and again self-love.
There are many methods to do that just by tuning into that part of you that is shy or embarrassed to express itself. Just by tuning in and using the power of your imagination and your intention to visualize that part of you and allowing yourself to look at it, there is already going to be a movement, a movement towards healing.
That is wonderful.
That is what we want.
You will feel that there is a shift in the way you express, how you feel about expression.
To recap – Let’s look at it again.
Is it an issue that comes from accepting what your style is?
Is it something that was created by the environment?
In both ways, we are going to activate self-love, which means unconditional and acceptance of who you are.
No judgment, no hard words, no negative thoughts, no cruelty.
Become aware of that. Become the big fluffy Mama.
In the case of the environment, let’s look deeper where it comes from and those kinds of traumas and members. There are many methods and techniques to heal that, but you can already do a lot by just acknowledging it’s there.
Allow it to come, allow it to communicate with yourself and then see how things change. Step by step.
- Practice no- judgment and self- love to yourself and the situation. You stand behind yourself and express better and better.
- Affirm that you can do it and feel more and more comfortable. Go on to say that to yourself, until it feels true.
- Visualize and start to imagine. Feel how it feels like to express your feelings and opinions and emotions in a way that is flowing from yourself, from your heart to another, and how the response is coming back as a beautiful flow adding into the fabric of communication.
You can already start and empower yourself to express in your way. Enjoy it. Start to create these wonderful collaborations with people you speak with joy.
Feel free to share some of your challenges as well.
You can also check out the Happy Godessa shop for amazing offers to help you on this journey OR you can book a time to chat with me 😄